On Not Giving In To Temptation

Over the weekend, I cleaned out the big lazy-susan corner cabinet in our kitchen.

At one point during the clean out, I was tempted by the idea of purchasing new containers for the flour, sugar, etc. I envisioned how neat and tidy the ingredients would look in matching triangular-shaped storage containers (a shape that would make maximum use of storage space on the circular shelves). But I did not give in to this temptation.

At another point, I was tempted to get out my labeler and label the shelf edges, indicating where everything should go. But I did not give in to this temptation.

I was also tempted by the thought of making tags to go under each item, to indicate what should go where, to (theoretically) help guide my long-term tidy use of the cupboard. But I did not give in to this temptation.

Instead, I simply took everything off the shelves and wiped them down, then kept the things we use, and tossed (or set aside to give away) the things we don't. I got rid of some five-year-old marjoram and some half-used cake-decorating gel of unknown vintage. I consolidated three partially-used bags of confectioner's sugar into one. And so on. Then I tried to do a slightly better job of placing like things together when I put the baking supplies back into the cupboard.

The result? A better organized cupboard, that didn't cost a thing and has no complicated maintenance scheme. And it currently still looks as good as it did three days ago.

Given the fact that I have sometimes in the past given in to the temptations of "unnecessary container purchases" and/or "needlessly complex strategies," I consider my less-is-more cupboard clean-out a success!

Yankee Swap

I have friends in overalls whose friendship I would not swap for the favor of the kings of the world. ~ Thomas Edison

There is a somewhat silly tradition, here in the Northeast, called a "Yankee Swap". The object of this holiday party game is to find something you wish to get rid of, something that you can't stand, something that you don't need or something that creates clutter. Each party guest picks her item from her home, and wraps it as ornately as possible. I've seen giant boxes, with other boxes getting smaller and smaller with every opening, and with each one more elegantly fashioned than the last, to end with a very small package...that contained a set of poker chip wine glass charms. Regifting is not a faux pas for Yankee Swaps. It's the expectation! I've seen Chia Heads wrapped with a silver and gold theme. I've seen a set of "World's Worst Dictators" hand towels, stylishly presented in Macy's wrapping. I, myself, once wrapped up two truly terrible snowman mugs (with long carrot noses, making them impossible to drink from) in a Victoria's Secret bag. The name of the game is getting rid of something you don't like, and having a laugh over something you receive. The more extravagantly and enticing the wrapping, the more likely your item will be chosen!

Unlike other parties, in which gifts are chosen by number, and can be "stolen" by someone with a higher number, a Yankee Swap is all about laughs, decluttering and realizing how much unnecessary 'stuff' we all have accumulated over the years. Called a "White Elephant" party in other parts of the country, the whole point of this gathering is to have fun...and to declutter while you do so. Interestingly, we have actually received a few things that were other family's 'trash', but became our 'treasure'. One year, we unwrapped a couple of DVD's that another family didn't like, but that my husband and son were thrilled with. Yet another time, I received a battered old cookbook that the giver didn't like and had no interest in keeping. To her, it was junk. To me? A treasure trove of old fashioned, down home recipes that I use to this day. In the meantime, we had managed to unload some Christmas chotchkies that weren't "us" but came to be enjoyed by people who try to transform their home into a winter wonderland. It just goes to show that what may be an item that's intensely disliked by one person may go on to bring joy to another.

If nothing else, a Yankee Swap is a great excuse for a party, it's a fun way to declutter a few things you don't like and will provide you with a source of laughter during a stressful season ahead.

Cookie Cutter Solution

I've been absent from this blog for so long, one might conclude that I've once and for all conquered my household clutter and no longer need to blog about it.

Well, one would be very kind to think that but... one would be mistaken.

Nope, I'm still here with my ebb and flow of accumulations. It's just been a particularly busy stretch, so while I've continued to read and enjoy my fellow bloggers' entries, I haven't commented on them or made any of my own lately. But I'm back now, and hoping to check in once a week or so with my thoughts and progress.

November and December tend to be so busy that I'm keeping my clutter-clearing ambitions low; but, taking the slow-but-steady approach to things, my current project is to tackle a kitchen drawer every couple of days until I make it through them all. Today's foray into one of the "gadget" drawers has me contemplating this:

Does a person who doesn't enjoy rolling out cookie dough and who lacks the necessary patience for decorating sugar cookies truly need such a sizable collection of cookie cutters?

Uh, going out on a limb here, but, gosh, er: Nope. She does not.

So. I'm thinking I'll keep a few for sentimental reasons (and just on the off chance that I might actually use them one day), then find a new home for the rest.

And if I take care of them now, I can spare myself the annual agony of thinking about how I should make some beautifully decorated holiday cookies using those lovely cutters all the while aware of the fact that the cookies stand a better chance of rolling themselves out than ever being made by me.

(That said, if the cookies do manage to spontaneously create themselves, I'll gladly eat them.)

A quick fix

Here's how to get your home office/spare room sorted out quick smart: invite your in-laws to come and stay for a few weeks.

Mind you, our home has no closets, so there's nowhere really to hide. So, on the first day, we filed and recycled unsorted papers on one day. On the next, we trafficked stored clothing and craft materials out of the wardrobe and into temporary storage in our bedroom. On the third day, I dusted, vacuumed, aired and made up the fold-out bed while my husband picked up his parents at the airport. On the fourth day, we all rested!

They've just gone back home again, and after folding the bed back in, I now have a useable home office. True, I do have a largeish pile of extraneous stuff in my bedroom, but most of it can go to the op shop, and what little remains will be returned to the guest room wardrobe for storage.

Not bad for a quick fix.

Pimp my ride...or just clean it.

"Neatness: The state of being neat and smart and trim." ~ Webster's Dictionary

There is a terrific show on MTV, starring a rapper named Xzibit, who surprises car owners with 'extreme makeovers' for their cars. Born Alvin Nathaniel Joiner, "X" is part comedian, part tough love expert and part automotive artistic visionary. Perhaps it was growing up in Detroit, but "X" gives the kind of care to autos, which would easily fit into the "Cash for Clunkers" program, to turn them into one of a kind, revelations about what cars *could be*...a reflection of an individual's needs, taste and style. In this era of disposable possessions, it's fascinating to see people rebuilding, re-imagining and rethinking what cars look like. Instead of junking these wrecks, Xzibit goes to great lengths, with the help of an incredible team, to make each car into a showpiece. This show really creates a sense of stewardship; not just taking care of what we own, but making it better. It's both entertaining and enlightening to see exactly what this California based team can come up with next. A jacuzzi in the back of a pick up? Wide screen TVs on every flat surface in a Mom-mobile? A golf putting green on the roof of a van?

Yet, my car is just fine. It runs well. It's nothing special, and doesn't boast a sound system worthy of a rock concert. But, it gets me to my many destinations every day, and for that I'm grateful. I have often said that, since I became a mother seventeen years ago, I have lived in my car. That's metaphorically because we do have a home. With all the driving I've done, from the early years of Gymboree to the school pick ups to Little League and off to school out of state, my car has been the home base for our busy lives. And this shows in the way it looks. I am reasonably certain that there is nothing growing mold on it inside my car, but I can't be positive. At this very moment, I have three empty water bottles, four magazines (one torn to bits), two blankets for the hockey rink, forgotten bills, mounds of dog hair, 3 mittens (that do not match one another), a broken dog leash, an empty wrapper for a Cereal bar, forgotten sunglasses, many dollars in loose change, a cracked coffee cup,my yoga bag, a book on CD that's missing one disc, a snapped in half hair brush, 12 pens, 1 melted lipstick and a case of Orangina. This is actually a good day. There are no bags from Subway or Dunkin' Donuts and I remembered to take out the wet towel from bringing the dogs swimming in the lake. My car, in short, is still a mess.

I have never really given much thought to my cars. My husband loves to quote me as saying "I just want to put the key in and have it go, I don't care about anything else." When we were first dating, my future brother in law used to take my car, unbeknownst to me, and wash it for me, because he couldn't stand the dirt. My mother in law is amazing about her cars...she cleans up the interior when she gets home from work every day. I am in awe, because I think I might practice this same action twice a year. Yet, as I look around my home, I realize I'm making such good progress here. My closet is organized and I can find all my clothes easily, hung by color and type of item. My laundry room is so tidy, you could eat off the floor (okay,maybe the dogs could). My 'sanctuary room' of my living room remains my clutter free zone. I tidy up the kitchen every night before I go to bed. Yet, my car seems to be my worst stumbling block. It looks as if I am a Clutter Club Drop Out.

I've set the bar for my car's future neatness so low that even I may be able to achieve it: I just don't want to be embarrassed when someone rides with me. I shrank in horror when a girlfriend and I were going out to dinner, and she emerged from my car looking as if she had rubbed an animal all over herself...there was that much dog hair on her seat. I plan to take two bins outside with me as I clean: one for pitching and one for putting away immediately. I have a bad habit of doing this and leaving the "put away bin" in the garage for eternity. The car will look great in the short term, but then the garage will become littered with, what my husband calls, "Ellen boxes". I plan on vacuuming out enough fur to theoretically knit a sweater. I plan on using Armor All on my seats and flat surfaces, and to clean my windows. Finally, I'm taking my car over to the car wash to have the outside looking more bronze and less dirty gray.

The question now remains? How do I keep it this way? As much as I'd love to say "I'll be my Mother in Law....I'll clean it every night!", I know that's not realistic. Between teaching yoga classes 4 days a week, attending graduate school classes, running errands, going to sporting events to watch my kids, taking the pups to the dog park and simply being on the road as much as I am, going for the goal of "Pristine" is unrealistic. What I can do, however, is try to get the worst of it every day....to bring out anything broken, anything I don't need to use in the next 24 hours and anything that's actually trash. Then, I plan on doing a big 'detox' once a week....Sunday nights seem to be a perfect time, as it will conclude our hockey and soccer watching weekends on the road. Then, I can begin my week with a fresh car! I also plan to keep an organizer, or just simply one box, in the way back of my SUV, to hold those necessities that I have to keep: my blankets (nicely folded, and without coffee spills), my yoga bag, my emergency kit and other necessary items. I believe it'll be far easier to find them without a 50 lb. bag of kibble on top of them.

Will I do a perfect job of this new area of becoming clutter free? Probably not. But, I have set my intention and hope I can achieve better. At the very least, I hope my friends will no longer look like Chewbacca when they exit my car.

Clearing Clutter for Moving...

Moving on, is a simple thing, what it leaves behind is hard. ~ Dave Mustaine

Although my husband and I aren't planning to move for approximately one year, the amount of work we have facing us is staggering. Not only do we need to find a new house, in a new state, we have to get our current home in order to sell. If I began a list of all the projects we need to accomplish before we list our house, I could easily be holding a scroll of paper to rival Santa Claus' naughty and nice list. There are rooms to repaint, floors to refinish, tiling to be replaced, shingles to be reshingled, hardware to be changed out, cabinets to be emptied and rooms to be recarpeted. There are closets to be organized, rooms to be staged, furniture to move (and clean behind) and curb appeal to be updated. We need to create a feeling of openness and airiness in a home that's been lovingly, busily and thoroughly lived in by a family of 4 humans, two large dogs and one rabbit. In short, we need to take ourselves out of the equation. I have been watching television shows on HGTV, like "Designed to Sell" and "House Hunters", to give me ideas of what people are looking for when they buy a home. It's an exceptionally overwhelming process.

Decluttering, as one gets ready to sell a house, is a completely different level of organization than regular "day to day" restructuring. An aspect of the very early stages of this process has been one question: "Will we use this in the next house?". As cluttered as my home tends to get, and as much as my husband loves to save everything he wants to use eventually, we're both looking at this time of readiness as a transition in, and of, itself. Just the act of getting ready to put a house on the market, to move and to start over is a daunting task. Of course, it's also a very healing one. In beginning to work through our basement, our attic storage and the various rooms of our house, we can take critical looks at everything we own and say "Yes....this is definitely going to make the the move with us", or "No...this has been great here, but it doesn't need to make the trip". We're learning how to prioritize what we still plan to use, until we leave, and what we're ready to say goodbye to now...knowing that it will not make the long trek down I-95. When one begins to declutter for an upcoming move, we tend not to put things in boxes for 'someday': we have permission to become much more analytical in what we keep and what we eliminate. When I think of what will simply clutter up a staged house for sale, or what I want to pay movers to take for me, I can begin to process the outgoing items far more logically, and with less emotion.

Although our moving plans aren't definite, and we don't have an exact timetable, we do have our goals of relocation and downsizing. By knowing what we wish to accomplish by next summer, we can begin tackling all of the many items on our lists, slowly and methodically. On the one hand, this gives us plenty of time to accomplish all goals. On the other, with such an open ended time frame, it is difficult to get motivated. Yet, when we focus on our new life, what it will be like and having it be closer to friends and family, we know that the hard work and dedication will be worth it. It's the getting from here to there, and how, when and where, that will be an intriguing journey.

It makes me awfully glad we have a year!

Off to school.....clutter free!

Let us not look back in anger, nor forward in fear, but around in awareness. ~James Thurber

One year ago today, our house looked like a tornado hit just come through, and had caused massive devastation. Had there been an undocumented hurricane? Was there an earthquake off the Richter scale? No. It was simply a case of preparing my daughter to leave home for prep school in Massachusetts. Our entire house was filled with every possible item she might need in the year ahead. From one end of the house to the other, there were sheets, pillows, towels, tubs of shampoo and beauty products, posters, shoes, clothing for a year, sporting equipment (including an ice hockey bag), non-perishable food......and of course, an exceptional large amount of school supplies. There were cases of water, an electric tea kettle, a laptop computer and printer, and an I-pod home. We managed to find room for a set of shelves, another made up of a wheeling cart and a memory foam mattress pad. Adding to the chaos was a hair straightener, a curling iron and a blow dryer. The full length mirror, the shoe carrier and the under-bed storage unit were spread out with the curtains, the shower shoes & kit and the Ugg boots. Needless to say, in the weeks leading up to Caroline's departure, we all felt a sense of stress....due largely to the mess.


This method of purchasing what we knew Caroline needed, and tossing it in an open space simply didn't work. It only added to the confusion, and in the process, kept us from realizing what we'd already purchased and what we needed. For example: we found terrific curtains to block out the pesky sun from her east facing room. However, we'd neglected to buy a curtain rod, curtain hangers or to bring tools with which to hang up the curtains! The lack of a plan also made moving into Caroline's dorm room more chaotic. We weren't quite certain where each group of items were, and as the car was packed as haphazardly as the dorm-room-items were stored in the house, it made our unloading and set up process that more disorganized. We were able to unload our daughter's comforter and pillows first thing, but the rest of her bedding was buried in the bottom of the carload...creating a tough way to make her bed to use as a staging area for the room.


This year, we plan to do things in a more organized manner. We hope that this will make packing the car, and then unpacking on campus, that much simpler. Rather than look back and berate ourselves on last year's pitiful performance, we are taking a critical examination of how we can make this year a more pleasant experience. We've already begun keeping one space in the family room as a 'staging area'. This will help to contain the mess of "dorm stuff", as well as to enable us to pack more efficiently. We plan to keep ongoing lists of what we have and what we need. We are going to go through Caroline's boxes, and Rubbermaid tubs, to see what's still in excellent shape and what needs to be replaced. When we replace an item, we will dispose of the old one, to keep it from mucking up the works. We also plan to load the car in the reverse pattern of how we wish to unload it...and to set up our daughter's room. That way, the first items we'll need (such as my husband's tool box and the bedding) can come in first, and the things that can be saved for later in the day (such as the posters and wall safe poster goo) can be packed in less accessible places.


My best advice for readers who are sending their children off to school is to take a look online at the "what to bring" lists for college and preparatory school students. Then, ask a current student and parents what they really found that they needed. You may realize that those lists include items (such as microwaves) that many dorms do not allow. You may also hear, from the current student, what she truly wished she'd had. Had it not been for my friend, Molly, we never would have known to purchase a memory foam mattress pad. Dorm beds are notoriously uncomfortable and bad for backs. Caroline's mattress pad may not have been on the list her school suggested, but it certainly made a difference in the way she slept. Don't be afraid to ask questions....most families are happy to share their experiences of what works...and what simply doesn't.


It's my hope that our year of chaos can help another family avoid the hurricane of dorm preparation!

Everything I Need To Know I Learned From My Dehumidifier (er, or something like that...)

I suspect there's a lesson for me in my basement. Which is to say, lately I’ve been contemplating my dehumidifier.

Ah, the dehumidifier. Staple of the Midwest home. Basements of course vary, but ours is definitely of the damp-in-the-summer variety. For several years, we had an earnestly ineffectual dehumidifier, which chugged away loudly but only barely managed to keep the basement walls from weeping. Last year we replaced it with a better, higher capacity model. The difference was noticeable within hours. I was ecstatic, as the new dehumidifier suddenly made our basement a pleasant place to be on a hot summer day.

But earlier this summer, I lost a little of my lovin’ feeling toward our dehumidifier.

Sure, it was still working its subterranean-oasis-magic. But with the humidity honeymoon being over, this summer I started paying more attention to the dehumidifier’s electricity use. Which meant I also paid a little more attention to how constantly the thing was running. I fiddled around with different humidity settings, thinking it might run less often if I altered its goal humidity level; but the change seemed to make little difference. On and on and on it ran. I even went so far as to take it in for repair, sure that something must be wrong with it. I brought it home, plugged it in – but it was the same old almost-constantly-running dehumidifier.

This troubled me. In main part because of the electricity use. But also due to, well, empathy for the darn thing. Yes, it’s a dopey thing to project one’s emotions onto an inanimate object. But the dehumidifier’s efforts earlier this summer seemed to be running eerily parallel to my own. There I was, running constantly, yet never quite meeting my goals; and there it was, doing exactly the same.

But there is at least one significant difference between me and a dehumidifier. Which is: a dehumidifier has setting buttons. And one of them happens to be a two-hours-on-two-hours-off option. Recently, I decided to switch over to that setting. By doing so, I immediately cut the dehumidifier’s energy use nearly in half. Given its previous running-all-the-time status, that stood to reason. But what surprised me about the change was this: it didn’t make a huge negative impact on the basement humidity level.

Sure, it does get a bit more humid down there during the two off hours. But not disastrously so. And when the dehumidifier comes back on, it rather quickly deals with the humidity build-up, and returns the basement to pleasant oasis condition.

Which now leaves me wondering: is there a lesson for me in here? Something about the impact of small, concentrated efforts, with clearly defined on and off periods?

I haven’t fully sorted it out yet, but I do think my dehumidifier has something to teach me about time, project, and clutter management; and about life efficacy in general.

Now if only I could find my settings panel.

Stuff vs clutter

We just returned from a 6-week overseas holiday to find that the college-age couple housesitting for us did an amazing tidy-up. We found ourselves in a very good place for busting clutter.

And somehow the clutterous things that had previously melded with the household landscape now stood out clearly, and it became very easy to chuck things out: magazines, clothes, tchotchkes.

And then it became easy to do some serious cleaning. High up on a long-ignored kitchen shelf, where the greasy dust had collected out of sight, I picked up a grimy old souvenir from Japan: a plain white cup filled with fake plastic "coffee". A few inches above the cup, suspended by a stream of white plastic, is a tiny pitcher. It looks like an invisible hand is pouring cream into the cup.

They're really big on making exceptionally realistic fake plastic food in Japan, so this isn't quite as badly kitschy as it sounds.

The coffee cup is pretty good kitsch, actually. However. This particular example has been around my husband for as long as I have. And no matter where we've lived, it sits somewhere not quite in eyeshot, not quite out of it, always sporting an impressive growth of dust. Once in a while I clean it off, but this time, I chucked it out.

Well, don't you know he returned home from his first day back at work and noticed its absence. "Where's my coffee cup with the cream thing?" Cue argument: don't throw out my stuff/clean your stuff/but it's my stuff/then look after your stuff.

It ended with me outdoors rummaging in the rubbish bin with a flashlight, unsure whether or not I hoped the cup had smashed when it landed in the bin.

It hadn't. I brought it inside and put it on the shiny clean counter. The revolting state it was in spoke plainly of a neglected object. He carefully wiped it clean and shiny, and put it on a lower shelf in the kitchen where we can see it. And where, no doubt, it will get the ongoing attention it requires to keep it from being mistaken for clutter in the future.

Breathing Room

There is no answer to any of life's questions. It's a matter of time and timing, of seas and seasons, of breathing in and breathing out. It's a matter of balance. ~ Peter McWilliams

One my greatest frustrations, on the declutter journey, is what a "3 steps forward, two steps back" method I seem to live by. Just when I have one room under control, with unneeded items brought to Goodwill or simply pitched, with shelves organized and tidy, with a plan of action under way, I find that another room simply implodes. While I have the very best of intentions on keeping my decluttering and organization skills on track for the whole house, I've discovered that my plans seem to only work when I'm actively focused on one particular space. The sad truth is, I'm a dreadful multi-tasker. I can keep the kitchen looking like magazine photo, but them my bedroom becomes a dumping ground. I can make certain that my laundry room is the very picture of streamlined success, but the front hall begins to resemble a shipyard loading zone. In short, I just can't seem to keep up with all of it at the same time. Like a circus performer with plates spinning on sticks above my head, I can only seem to manage one dish. I tend to be self-critical because I'm unable to keep a half dozen going a once in each hand.


I have come to realize, however, that despite my lack of success in juggling all the rooms of my house, and the many areas of my life that need regulation, I feel incredibly tense when there is chaos all around me. As much as my brain and heart want for me to be a 'streamlined self-correcter', my natural tendencies simply don't lie in this skill set. So, I find myself in a vicious circle: I feel hectic because my house is in disarray, so I focus my cleaning on one room. While I am making that room perfect and systematic, another room becomes even worse than it had started. So, my stress level rises dramatically. as I take in the cluttered mess in the next room, I abandon my original project to focus on the room that looks worse. In "Tasmanian Devil" fashion, I find myself moving like a whirlwind from room to room and space to space, spinning my organizational wheels and accomplishing little. So, what is there to do?


I have discovered that by making just one space in my house consistently clutter free, I can feel more relaxed. Knowing that there will always be one room that is clean, tidy, clutter free and nicely "done", I can let myself off the hook for being perfect in other areas in my home. This idea may sound like a cop out, and it probably is. But, I have found that my 'breathing room' space works for me. It's a place in which I can recharge my emotional batteries, read a book, breathe deeply, and not look around at all the projects I have to accomplish. By maintaining this 'safe zone', I am confident that I will not trip over my son's hockey skates, my daughter's soccer bag, my dogs collection of mangled socks (otherwise known to them as beloved toys) or stacks of dishes that must be washed. My "Breathing Room" is a kid-rough-housing-free, trash-free, food-free and clutter-free zone. I do happily welcome visitors into the living room...IF they can abide by keeping the space clear of mess and distractions. Interestingly, while I find that I'm fighting an uphill battle to keep the hallway and kitchen in perfect condition, my teenagers do respect my living room rules. Now and then, I'll find my daughter reading in her favorite chair, or my son on his laptop, using the wireless network in there. My husband and I can enjoy a glass of wine, without worrying about our endless list of "honey' do'" projects. The amazing discovery is that the whole family seems to relish the "Breathing Room" with the same enjoyment I feel.

While we're far from perfect on this declutter journey, and while it feels as if the process is never ending, maintaining just one space for breathing room appears to have benefits to all of us. It's a quiet retreat in which we can seek sanctuary, taking time to relax and renew...and then begin 'fighting the good fight' against clutter again, once we are restored.